Thursday, April 27, 2017

If you cannot afford food in #Uganda, eat termites

I am supposed to RISE AND FIGHT. But being the WIMP I am, I'll just CRY AND SLEEP until I wake up tomorrow, collect termites all day for SUPPER, and then I'll cry again and SLEEP.
When the termites are Done, I'll turn to the Army Worms for food. When they are also done, I'll buy a food flask and pack Beatles for my kids.
The next day, I'll exchange my motorcycle for a car. Who said we can't exchange a loaf of bread for a thousand cakes?
After all, I am more insecure around police officers than robbers. I'll open a liquor store, selling monkey piss wine, that should be expensive but the handshake will always bail us out.
Those who can't afford to eat earthworms should try Chinese plastic rice. As Muhoozi is made RDC for Sudan.
You see? Unless we go to bed with the tapeworms in Banus' inflamed belly.
I am in love with the woman who stole her child from herself you know why? Ask the wise men from the East.
I am not willing to be a loser in the Monkey Eating competitions. Since I haven't mentioned pads and a pair of Butts anywhere, I hope I am safe.
I remain Another TVO.  We are all Stella!

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