Here is how we are making #KampalaGreatAgain for Vision 2040 where no man shall know poverty, nor hunger, nor lack of school fees, nor disease nor crime. The sequence of events in the country only point to a clean advanced country which must not be judged for the amount of compassion it extends to the most vulnerable of its citizens. May thunder strike you!
1) Get rid of unemployed youth. Throw them in jail.
2) Demolish kiosks and get rid of the rif raf that sell rolex all over the city. They can go get jobs at Sate House or become Crime Preventers.
3) Sweep away all the scum that sells fruits and vegetables on the streets. They can go live in IDP camps since most have no land to return to anyway.
4) Give school land to Chapati investors to build hotels. The kids can go join Namilyango or Nabisunsa.
5) Remove the stadium. Games can be watched on CCTV cameras since these are now all over the place. We shall have community projectors.
6) Evict market vendors and burn the markets down. We are getting arcades and these vendors ought to just go sell their wares to Uchumi, Shoprite and Nakumati.
7) Chase away boda bodas. These thugs are responsible for all the high profile murders in the country. They can now go join Flying Squad and Black Mamba which are always recruiting Criminals anyway. If you miss the boda bodas for your ride home, bring back Uganda Transportation Corporation. Temuli baavu.
8) The money changers. Those mobile money people that attract mitayimba to attack them or gun yielding police or army ought to also vacate the city. We now have mobile money direct so who needs shacks in the capital? 8) Finally the annoyance of unregistered SIM CARDS.
Did you all not get a National ID? Sorry if the deadline expired before the elections but you may now proceed to the Minister of Internal Affairs and get your ID. I miss Aronda though. Did you know you will not get a phone if you have no National ID or Passport, the latter of which requires the former? Kanve wano...